The Only Constant is Change

HOMELAND SECURITY TO RAID KFC

DATELINE - Washington, D.C.

In light of the Boston bombings, the Department of Homeland Security will raid KFC locations across the country beginning Wednesday.

Citing the corporation's stockpile of dangerous pressure cookers, Senator Dianne Feinstein (D-Calafornia) stresses the need for the "drastic measure."

"How many pressure cookers does any one person or any one corporation need," said Feinstein.

Director of Homeland Security, Janet Napolitano (D), joined Feinstein adding "these devices can be modified to kill hundreds if not thousands of Americans, and their continued presence in our society cannot be tolerated."

Mobilizing nearly 7500 Federal Agents is no small task.

According to sources in the FBI, the nearly 100,000,000 rounds of recently purchased ammunition will "be put to good use" if KFC employees resist in any way.

KFC issued a late response this afternoon, stating "warrantless searches and seizures are un-constitutional and we strongly disagree with this blatant violation of our rights as a corporation in America."

Feinstein and Napolitano plan on beginning the raids in New York and Connecticut.

In a joint statement, the two government officials cite "the lack of proper defensive weapons in possession of law abiding citizens" as the reason to begin in these two states.

Both New York and Connecticut recently passed some of the countries most stringent gun ownership legislation in the nation.

"We are not going to stop..." exclaimed Feinstein, "...once we remove these assault appliances from the largest possessor (KFC), we will move on to other corporations with an eventual mandatory ban on individual ownership."

Pro pressure cooker activists across the nation vow to resist stating "if you make owning a pressure cooker a crime, only criminals will have pressure cookers."

A Terrifyingly Possible AP Style Story
By Bob F. Dowd

PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW

By Bob F. Dowd

Today I had my physical. And in preparation for compliance with Obamacare next year, my physician had 1.5 hours

of mandatory federal paperwork for me

to fill out!

Imagine that, a government takeover with massive amounts of paperwork.

Not to mention a long discussion about how bad this plan will be for patients and doctors. "How this country re

- elected this man, I'll never get," she said. And I completely agree. But free stuff is a huge draw, like cheese in a mouse trap.

Included in the bureaucratic paperwork,

a host of intrusive questions I have never been asked before. Some of which have nothing to do with my health! For example: "Do you have any homicidal thoughts?" (Yes, after filling out all this) "Do you own a firearm?" (None of your Goddamn business) "Have you ever smoked marijuana?" (Ditto from above) "Do you plan on traveling outside the country?" (Ditto from above) "What are your children's names and social security numbers?" (Why do you need to know this for my information?) "Do you have any criminal conviction on your record?" "Has anyone in your immediate family been convicted of any criminal misconduct?" "How many cars do you own?" "How far do you drive each day?" "What medicines for anxiety or depression do you currently or previously take?" ... Ok, ok, that's enough. Do you see what is going on here? These are not questions for me and my doctor to discuss privately, or questions for her to treat me with a higher level of care. This is a federal Obamacare form. The government wants to know everything about my personal life, my politics, my family, etc. A level of intrusion into my personal life and medical history that even Winston Smith would be shock to suffer through.

(a FB like to the first person that gets this one and leaves a comment in the blog..NOT in FB).

There is also a new federal form everyone must fill out and sign, you cannot refuse to do so. This form asks questions about my current and past healthcare provider and work history. It allows my records to be shared with the government. Of course its all perfectly reasonable, under the guise of electronic medical records sharing databases. But to have the lab that is doing my blood work be required to report the results directly to the government? Without me or my doctor being able to review it, judge its accuracy or validity? Without our being able to do the lab work again if in error? Why is that? Now I'm no conspiracy nut, and this sounds like monitoring of my life so that later certain "decisions" can be made.

Finally, because my follow up is next year...the doctor is required to use a national company to remind me of my appointment. No longer will you get a call from your doctors office (oh I guess you could get two calls), now the friendly federal proxy will handle this reminder. Reminds me of "hi, I'm from the government and I'm here to help." This company has an exclusive contract with the federal government. Perfectly innocent, right? Well think on this for a minute, now the Feds will know when you see your doctor and what your seeing him/her for. The results of tests, the treatment and the outcome or ongoing issue.

Slippery Slope is no fallacy. In the words of Neal Armstrong, "one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." Small steps that seem "perfectly reasonable," that seem "perfectly innocent," but small steps none the less. Steeps aimed at slowly shifting public acceptance of a total take over. A key strategy of the megalomaniac, religious zealot, imperialistic leader or just plain brainwasher.

Do I see actuarial tables being created and used to calculate the expense of care for conditions? Conditions being weighed against life expectancy and/or quality of life? Well, if you want Obamacare to pay for it, you will have to live with the decisions that are coming for you from our old friend O’Brien (remember that FB like). If not, then you better have a huge pile of cash (or what ever is worth something when all this is in play), and pay under the table for the care, discretion and longevity you were getting when healthcare was just between you and your physician.

BfD